in the garden.
today i walked in the afternoon sun, appreciating the heat of noon. knowing the cold of early dusk comes too soon in these days.

i decided for this day, i will dream of what feels impossible. if i could pick up and start again, where would i be, what would i do, wear.


i could be a fashion designer. a runway model. i would touch fabrics all day, and sketch at my desk in the city. i could wear pantsuits and gucci sunglasses. i could go to meetings in wearing black and grey and pointy heeled shoes and wear my hair in a bun.

if i could forget the hard things for a moment. or even the stablity that keeps me loving life. what if even these treasured things, my students and friends and home, could all melt into something new and so different that i am another me.

and i am refreshed in these moments. and now the sun has set, and i return to this path and the emotions i feel when sitting in my very own clawfoot bathtub. and i will live this life. thankfully. but perhaps i will dream again another monday. this is what gardens are for.