today we measured 12 X 24 feet for my shaded retreat patio with hammock and bbqed chicken. the chicken does not come with the cement and veranza, but will flow from the warm so cal air and company of friends. this i have wanted since i moved in, and any more years in the house without enjoying the outside is just a waste.


i have thoughts about the spirit, balance, and holding time and space carefully, with room for joy to flow.


but my thoughts are elusive, so i'll say that living in balance for today feels like laughing with my piano teacher, eating sweet dates while talking to the cute guy at the middle eastern coffee chop, and driving all over los angeles... me and my music a bit lonely, at the same time holding a deep empty feeling below my heart.


it will take months to finish many projects at the house. and in the meantime, maybe i'll cook chicken in the driveway.